Hey girls! So here you go, story number two. So there was this boy named Landon. Landon and I had known each other for a long time (We were winter formal dates freshman year), but we had just started becoming good friends over the last month or so (of our senior year). We started flirting a little, but I, being the unobservant girl I am, didn't really think much of it. Then one night when we were walking out to our cars, he kissed me. Yikes! This was my newly-found really good friend, I didn't have feelings for him like this! He left and I called my best friend, Casey. She told me that Landon had been talking to the other boys and he really liked me and wanted to be my boyfriend and on and on. I realized then and there that I had to talk to him about it. I talked to him later that night and he said he had a fantastic time that night. I agreed. I then went on to say that I think he is a fantastic guy, but I really believe that we are much better as friends than boyfriend/girlfriend. The timing wasn't right and I couldn't be the girl he needed to be as his girlfriend. And what did he do? He agreed! He said that he valued our friendship so much more so we were just going to leave it at that. Now, our friendship has never been better.
Okay, so this is an extreme situation. I told you I've had a lot of boys. However, I still think it proves the point that it is possible to be friends with someone who had a crush on you and it is always better to tell him it wouldn't work than to fake it. Oh I've got a story about faking it, too, but I'll save that one for later.
So what do you do? A boy has a crush on you and you don't feel the same way. If he asks you to a dance, consider it. Even if you don't have feelings for him like that, you could still have a ton of fun. If it's a total no-no, tell him that you won't be able to go to the dance with him. But if you make an excuse to get out of it ("My mom won't let me go," "My dad doesn't believe in dates," etc.) make sure you follow through and don't go!
If he just flirts with you a lot and asks you to hang out. Say no to the hanging out, preferably with a handy excuse. Also, when you talk to him, throw in words like "bud" and "pal" and maybe even talk about the boy you have a crush on or at least who you think is cute.
If he asks you to be his girlfriend always say no. Nothing is worse than faking it. In middle school a boy named Anthony had a huge crush on me. I didn't feel the same at all. He asked me out and I was caught so off-guard that I said yes! Bad plan. Needless to say, we went on one date (with a friend) and I came up with a convenient excuse to break up with him within 5 days. He still introduces me to people as his ex-girlfriend though. Yuck.
Now, no one wants to hurt anybody else's feelings. But truthfully the longer you let the boy have hope, the more it will hurt.
Good luck girls!
Everyone's big sis,
Chelsea
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Friday, November 28, 2008
So there's this boy...
Hey girls! So, I'm sure each one of you has had some boy. Whether he was a crush or he had a crush on you or maybe even a combination of both. Well, I'm going to tell you some stories and try to help you out in each of those situations. So, grab your stuffed animal. It's storytime.
1. The Crush
So I had this boy. His name was Kris and I had the biggest crush on him. We sat next to each other in religion class (I went to a Catholic school.) He would talk to me a little in class and flash me the cutest smile whenever something funny happened, but outside of those few moments I wasn't even on his radar. Slowly we started talking to each other a little more, but we never really got past that. I thought he was too cool for me, anyway.
Well here's my advice, girls. First of all, don't think that anyone is too cool for you. If that's how it goes, then you don't want them anyway (Easier said than done, I know, but try it anyway.) Second of all, talk to him. Even if it's just a few comments about the classwork or making fun of something your teacher said. Anything that can get you to interact is good. After you start talking in class, take it outside the classroom. Flash him a smile when he walks by in the hallway or when you see him in the lunch room. Throw out a "hi" when you pass him on the way to class. Just these little things will make him notice you and probably even brighten his day (Happiness is contagious, you know.) And if you make him happy, you are already on the way. It might not turn into anything more than a friendship, but hey, you just made another friend. And the better you are at being friends with a boy, the better you will probably be if you actually date them. It makes it even easier to get close to him if you get to be friends with his friends too, although that's not a requirement. Regardless, go for it. Don't be scared and think that he is out of your league. What's the worst that can happen? He might not have a crush on you, but who needs to know? We'll just keep that our little secret. ;-)
Well, I think this is enough advice for now. Next time, I'll tell you how to let the boy down easy when that crush isn't quite returned. 'Til then, keep being yourselves girls!
Everyone's big sis,
Chelsea
1. The Crush
So I had this boy. His name was Kris and I had the biggest crush on him. We sat next to each other in religion class (I went to a Catholic school.) He would talk to me a little in class and flash me the cutest smile whenever something funny happened, but outside of those few moments I wasn't even on his radar. Slowly we started talking to each other a little more, but we never really got past that. I thought he was too cool for me, anyway.
Well here's my advice, girls. First of all, don't think that anyone is too cool for you. If that's how it goes, then you don't want them anyway (Easier said than done, I know, but try it anyway.) Second of all, talk to him. Even if it's just a few comments about the classwork or making fun of something your teacher said. Anything that can get you to interact is good. After you start talking in class, take it outside the classroom. Flash him a smile when he walks by in the hallway or when you see him in the lunch room. Throw out a "hi" when you pass him on the way to class. Just these little things will make him notice you and probably even brighten his day (Happiness is contagious, you know.) And if you make him happy, you are already on the way. It might not turn into anything more than a friendship, but hey, you just made another friend. And the better you are at being friends with a boy, the better you will probably be if you actually date them. It makes it even easier to get close to him if you get to be friends with his friends too, although that's not a requirement. Regardless, go for it. Don't be scared and think that he is out of your league. What's the worst that can happen? He might not have a crush on you, but who needs to know? We'll just keep that our little secret. ;-)
Well, I think this is enough advice for now. Next time, I'll tell you how to let the boy down easy when that crush isn't quite returned. 'Til then, keep being yourselves girls!
Everyone's big sis,
Chelsea
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Been There, Done That
Hey girls, my name is Chelsea. I'm a 19-year-old college sophomore and truthfully, I've dealt with a lot of boys in my time. (I still am!) I've had that one boy that you have a total crush on, but you can't even bring yourself to talk to. I've had the boy that is "in love" with you, who you want nothing to do with. (I'll try to let you know how to let him down easy.) And I've had the boy that you like a lot and he likes you too. (I can tell you how to find out if he does.)
Now that I've gone through it all, I figured I should share what I've learned with all of you. So here I am, your big sister for hire. Go ahead and ask me questions. I'll try to answer those and the burning questions I know everyone has. How do you talk to the really cute boy? How do you get a boy to dance with you? What to do if you have to let him down easy? And more. I hope to help and I'll share some of my personal stories, and those of my friends, so you know you definitely aren't alone. Hey, maybe I can even help you to not make the same mistakes we did. (And there were a lot.)
Catch up with me later and we'll get started on how to talk to this dream boy of yours. Bring your fuzzy slippers and some nail polish, and we're set for a good girl talk session.
Everyone's big sis,
Chelsea
Now that I've gone through it all, I figured I should share what I've learned with all of you. So here I am, your big sister for hire. Go ahead and ask me questions. I'll try to answer those and the burning questions I know everyone has. How do you talk to the really cute boy? How do you get a boy to dance with you? What to do if you have to let him down easy? And more. I hope to help and I'll share some of my personal stories, and those of my friends, so you know you definitely aren't alone. Hey, maybe I can even help you to not make the same mistakes we did. (And there were a lot.)
Catch up with me later and we'll get started on how to talk to this dream boy of yours. Bring your fuzzy slippers and some nail polish, and we're set for a good girl talk session.
Everyone's big sis,
Chelsea
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